WIPpet Wednesday

The productivity continues this week. I’ve been focusing on the battle scenes in Queen of Hearts. Writing action scenes is not my strong suit and I am so susceptible to telling rather than showing. I’m hoping that, with a bit more reworking, those scenes will be sufficiently respectable.

For today I have a fragment from a scene I wrote yesterday. I’m not sure I’ll keep it. It’s not exactly my style. Or rather, it’s the style I aim for but only hit once every so often. *sigh*

Context:

The Haelean commanders are overlooking the battlefield. Eran, a Farilien defector, suggests a cunning plan to Lorcan, who I introduced you to a few weeks ago. 🙂

“Send the reserve in now and there will be no Haelean left to keep the newly gained province controlled,” Eran said. “No, send the reserve south.”

“South?” Lorcan asked.

Eran smiled, a half formed thing. “Past the Farilien force towards the unprotected midlands, and, eventually, the capital. We distract their armies in the north and all the while, their country is already ours.”

Lorcan stared for a second, his gaze hooked on the curve of the aide-de-camp’s lips. “Ours?” he repeated slowly, drawing out the syllable.

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